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Vintage Classic Porn
Reviewed by Jacey on 1st January 2009

Overall Rating 83/100
Vintage Classic Porn
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Vintage Classic Porn, as you may well imagine, is an archive of adult pictures and movies dating from the 1920s and earlier, to the 1980s - and Iíve got to admit, Iíve absolutely loved reviewing it! If youíve ever longed to hark back to a simpler time, when breasts were real, women had hips, and Photoshop hadnít been invented yet, then youíre likely to feel as enthusiastic about it as I am! There are a couple of kinks to iron out, navigation could be a little better, and I wish there was more content, but there are some serious gems here which more than make up for it!


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Overall Rating 83/100
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Contrary to what you might initially think, Vintage Classic Porn is not just one for fans of big hair and shoulder pads, unlike many other Ďclassicí sites (although such fans will be well catered for here, donít panic) - it covers every decade from the 20s to the 80s, and while the average grandparent might not admit it, they were a seriously kinky lot back then! Youíll never look at that dear old lady at the bus stop in the same way again, I guarantee it...

One thing that pretty much all the material on here does have in common is that the models are pretty much always natural - if youíve got a furry muff phobia (even Iíll admit to being a bit wary of super-furry muffs every now and again, itís nothing to be ashamed of) then you might want to avoid this one. Also, if youíre of the opinion that silicone, bleach and eating disorders are the best things since sliced bread, youíre not likely to find much here that wonít make your eyes water... you poor misguided fool, you! However, for all of you who enjoy appreciating the beauty that is the true female form, come in, come in, thereís plenty to see here...!

Once you log onto the site, youíre taken to the homepage, which displays recent updates, and top rated sets and movies - from here, you can also use the navigation bar to access all photo and video content. You can filter your searches by decade, keyword and niche, but results will return both photos and videos; unfortunately you canít search them separately. Still, there are plenty of niches covered here, believe it or not! From amateur and anal, to mature, ethnic and peeing, with loads in between, youíre going to find something here thatís right up your alley, so to speak... I did have a slightly confusing moment, however - thereís a vintage/retro niche (a bit pointless on a vintage website) which, when clicked, returns no results! Thatís just a bit silly really. Did someone say pedantic..?

Iíll give you a lowdown of the kind of material youíre actually going to find on the site now - itís probably easier if I break things down by decade, as quality and subject matter do tend to vary greatly between them. All of the content from the 20s is, understandably, black and white - there are a fair amount of movies, which might surprise you, but donít expect clear pictures and great camera work - they had to wind the damn things by hand back then! The action in the movies is surprisingly hardcore, incorporating peeing, blowjobs, rimming, threesomes, anal and even some pretty shocking bondage scenes, and the ladies are generally cute, natural and aged between 20 and 45ish. The photos tend to be quite arty and posed with copious amounts of flowers, fur and feathers... obviously, they clearly liked killing things.

The 30s is much the same really, with the addition of interracial sex and gangbangs, and more classic, studio lit photos - the ladies are a little more pin-up style, and generally exude a bit more sex appeal. Movie quality is a little better too. The 40s material is still all black and white, but clearer, and encompasses Asian, mature, role play, and even wrestling. The girls tend to be busty, hourglass, and generally pretty damn sexy! The 50s heralds the era of the true pinups, Bettie Page, Busty Belle, Candy Barr and Diane Webber, and as such, the content contains a lot of dancing and striptease, posing in fully fashioned lingerie etc - there is still some hardcore here, but itís a little more subtle than previous decades.

The 60s stuff is mainly in grainy colour, better quality, and has typically gorgeous 20-something girls with beehives and bouffants engaging in all sorts, from orgies to lesbian sex - they do tend to be very hirsute of nether regions though, which becomes much more obvious as the movie quality improves! The 70s content is mainly hardcore sex, with a few exceptions, with BBW, redheads, interracial, more group sex, and lots and lots of hair - afros, chest hair and moustaches abound at every turn! The 80s content is pretty much all hardcore, and itís more your usual crazed spunk fest sort of stuff - basically, anything goes! Think lesbians, old ladies and Ron Jeremy (sadly, not all together). A few of the girls also seem to have finally gotten to grips with their Ladyshaves, which will come as a relief to some, Iím sure!

There are 74 videos on Vintage Classic Porn at the moment, but I wish there were more! Iíve honestly found the content here completely fascinating (history lessons would have been a million times better if weíd studied the pornography of the time, seriously), and if youíre anywhere as strange as me, you will too... Anyway, the video quality, as explained before, varies greatly - for some of the movies you literally have to squint to see properly, whereas others are perfectly clear. They vary in length too, from 2 minutes to an hour or so, and depending on this, some are split into clips. They can be streamed with Microsoft Silverlight, which is like Flash, or downloaded in 3 resolutions, up to 640 x 480. Download speed is pretty quick and streaming quality is excellent, although youíll probably need to install Silverlight on your system.

Just a quick note to clarify - I know Iíve gone on about this one like itís some sort of strange online museum, but I guarantee, it will not only fascinate you - it will give you the raging horn as well. Just in case you were wondering.

There are just over 2000 photos on the site at the moment - but again, they need more! Theyíre arranged in albums with names like ĎNaughty Housewivesí and ĎSexy Buttsí - which are pretty self explanatory really. Generally, the photos in the albums are all from different shoots, and of different girls - so while it might not look like youíre going to find what you want from the preview image, whatís inside the album will likely be different, so itís always worth a look. Obviously, photos vary hugely in size and quality - I personally prefer the older black and white photos to the colour ones, probably because photographers were already masters of monochrome by the 40s and 50s, but were only just properly getting to grips with colour when the 80s came around! Still, itís all down to personal preference really. I will warn you that some of the images have clearly been scanned in from books, and as such can be very small and low quality, which is a shame. There is an online viewing gallery, and photosets can also be downloaded as zip files - thereís no slideshow feature at the moment though.

The site is updated with either photos or a movie daily.

Picture Features

Quantity: Approx 2,060
Picture Size: Varies
Searchable: Yes
ZIP Downloads:
Picture Slideshows:
Updates: Daily

Video Features

Quantity: 74+
Formats: WMV/ASF
Video Size: Up to 640 x 480
Clip Duration: Varies
Downloadable: Yes
Preview Thumbs: Yes
Video DRM:
IPod/PSP Videos:
Updates: Daily

General Features

Member Support: No
Movie Support: Yes
Join Option: Credit Card, SMS/Mobile/Cell, Ideal
Join Fees: 19.95 Euros for 30 days, 54.95 Euros for 90 days
Cancellation Links: On home page